ONE THING, ONE PERSON 

I remember walking into that room and starting to wonder if I should have gone at all. There were so many people in one place and the moment they said we would do group interviews, I was thinking to myself, “Oh no”. I am an introvert, so naturally, I am not the most enthusiastic person when it comes to group assignments. Well, at least that was the case back then. 

Growing up, I was always a confident and well-spoken child and that made me often find myself leading teams. Whether it was in the classroom or in the playgroups I somehow could not hide. Even though I enjoyed playing with others and was outside a lot, I also remember being by myself many times. Mostly to read a book, dream, think or sometimes even just stare at the skies. I remember listening to a lot of music. Music would take me to beautiful places in my mind that I cherished. The older I grew, the more inclined I was to doing things by myself and spending more time on my own.

When I was in university, my introverted personality was crystal clear. I couldn’t wait to get back to my house after class. I avoided group work at all times unless it was mandatory. Even then, I’d volunteer to do the presentations so I wouldn’t have to attend the group sessions. This was also encouraged by perfectionist tendencies. It was so hard for me to believe that someone else would execute a task as well as I believed I would. This was a subconscious belief that I didn’t even know I had but it was manifesting in the things I would do.

Little did I know all the amazing experiences and relationships I was missing out on simply because I couldn’t see beyond my personality. I was so caught up in who I thought I was that I couldn’t even see beyond that and picture who I could become. Yes, you guessed right. Immediately after the interviews, those of us who were lucky enough to pass the interviews got placed in squads where we would be learning and doing tasks together. As life would have it, almost everyone in my group was an extrovert and I was quite happy to listen to them and engage very rarely but I couldn’t hide forever. Over time, I began to warm up to my squad members and team work didn’t seem as dreadful as I had painted it out to be in my mind. It got to the point where I would look forward to our conversations and the tasks we would be given. That became the highlight of the program for me then.

There was one person from my squad who would always call me right when I felt like quitting. When I felt overwhelmed, he would call me. At the time when we just began the program, the world had just gone into lockdown because of COVID-19 and I was also going through so many personal changes. Naturally, I would feel so overwhelmed at times. Without me saying anything, somehow he always called to check up on me when I needed it. We would talk about the most mundane things and after our conversations, I would always feel lighter. Through this I learnt how to lean on other people for support and just how important it is to have people that can speak life into you in this journey of life. 

I remember one thing in particular. When I joined the program and got placed in my squad, I would have never guessed those would be the people who would teach me how to see beyond myself and get out of my personality to fulfill purpose. My personality hasn’t changed.I was equipped with the tools to understand myself to a point where I can distinguish between being my most authentic self and allowing my personality to be a hindrance to growth and purpose. That was my one thing. What is your one thing? Perhaps it’s time management or could it be resilience? Maybe like me, it is your struggle with teamwork. That one thing is valid and could be for any reason, but you don’t have to allow it to define you. You can choose to write a different story from today by signing up for the Lapid Leaders Africa program. You will be thrown into deep waters and you will learn to float.

Written by Velma Mideva.

I went through all the three pillars and what I enjoyed most about it was being pushed out of my comfort zone in various areas.